I used to think that a few or a couple of years is a very short period of time. In the end of every year I thought that the time just flew by. Lately, I think instead of dwelling on time I concentrate all my energy on the experiences I encounter. If you look back at what has happened in the past one to five years, you’ll see the abundance of events! You have no idea! Now, in the end of 2016, I think of the time in school when I wrote the date in my journal that ended with two zeros (year 2000), I thought that was weird. And now it’s 2017 coming its way! Digging through childhood memories, it definitely feels that the time had just gone by and didn’t say goodbye.
I’ve been analyzing the last year and the year before; every period of my life was filled with multiple kinds of events, good and bad ones, and there were a lot. Every year plants a little change in me, and thanks to time I grew into the person I am today. Time can’t be neither under- nor overestimated. People say, time goes by unnoticed. Why so, we don’t forget what happens to us but maybe we simply choose to forget. People say, time heals. I don’t know about healing but maybe it goes away. We are the ones to decide. It is only you who decides how fast the time flies, only you know whether you lost it, or if it stopped, or if it healed you. Nobody but you can know how much you did during this time. Time doesn’t fly nor does it run slow. Why would week go fast and 9-hour working day be slow? You are the only one who chooses what time is to you.
So, I am looking at 2016 and thinking, I am so sick and tired of the endless waiting for “just a little bit more and finally some rest” – nope! it doesn’t work like this! I’m tired to live on the edge of the chair, you know, so stupid really. You take a seat on this time-train and then, dang, it’s the next year and you have to change again. This autumn I decided that I want to be more laid back and not be afraid to get comfy on my chair. I’d like to breathe freely without being scared to suffocate. I always pay attention to the details of what’s going on, but the most important thing is to live the moment and fully enjoy it, memorize the feeling. What I’ve been doing wrong is that I was afraid I’d loose the moment, not always but… often. In my life I went through… “some things” (there is no word for something that could have not had happened), and perhaps I just didn’t want the present to be “stolen” from me again. And so I breathed in and in and it felt that there is not enough O and little chance of getting more air. The year was going by, I was again worried that I haven’t done much. But my perception of the fast running time has now changed; I met some people who persuaded me and helped me understand how did I do, what I did right, what did I reach and where I stand. I used to avoid looking over my shoulder, it seemed there was nothing there. Now I turn around 180 degrees and look at everything that happened to me recently, with laughter and with tears. Then, I turn around towards the future and make a step forward. I don’t dwell anymore, …and I breathe out.
A little bit of Christmas mood from Stockholm for you
Many things can happen in one year. Usually I create a collage of 16 favorite pictures on Instagram in the end of each year under the tag #garvaresstash (which is very hard to do). This year is no exception, the collage will be up on Dec 31 or Jan 1. Only this time I decided to do something special: I thought it would be fun to collect some captures of a simple life surroundings, events, and post it right here in my newborn blog. We have thousands of images in our smartphones! I export photos from my phone every four months, it’s about 10k images per year, and I never see them twice. Those photos that are somewhat good are posted on Instagram and the rest goes to one of the folders on my computer. Me and my friend talked about how fun it is to print albums. I actually do it sometimes for my trips, I choose 30-40 images and order a little photo album on a random online service. Right now I have 5 small photo albums and to be honest I open them much more often than the folders on my hard drive. (BTW and FYI: While I was going through my photo archives I found so many fun images, so I decided to make a whole new post out of it! It will be up in the upcoming month).
Christmas of 1989, when I had chickenpox. And also my mom shaved my head, I was cool :)
Here are some fun gingerbread videos from the last year. I was inspired then and made a gingerbread house together with my friends plus a small one by myself. In spring I very much enjoyed crushing both of them. I think anyone would be glad to destroy a couple of gingerbread houses, so much for anger management :D
Insta-collages of 2015 and 2014: #garvaresstash
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